Vision Is Everything: Carey's Story


Years before my husband’s death, our bigger life plan had started to show itself and come into fruition. We were high school sweethearts. We graduated from college together, were both successful in our careers, active in our neighborhood, loved and involved in our church, and were blessed with a son and daughter. Our family and friends nearby were all supportive and involved in our lives. Life was perfect. 

Ross and I had two major goals with our family and kids. One was to make sure that we would be there for them no matter what and the second was to give them a very happy life. We were a very tight family. 

My business was two years old at the time my husband died by suicide. I am an entrepreneurial coach and my job is to help people see their life, get it down on paper and see their vision come to fruition. 

I knew he was sad. We spent months talking about his deep sadness. I attempted time and time again to help him recreate his vision and find his passion for life again. His job of 20 years had a major shift a year-and-a-half before his death he lost his brother, mom and dad in a short period of time. And both our children went off to college. Life changed for us and for him even more, really rapidly. 

He couldn’t create a new vision for himself.  He had a disease he could not conquer. On the outside, he still looked like his successful, outgoing, charming self. But on the inside, he simply could not fight the depression.

I still don’t know why he died the way he did. I never would have imagined Ross would have died by suicide. 

For months on end I would lay in bed and go through the whole incident in my mind. I had to convince myself time and time again that it really happened.

My kids and I still struggle with not understanding why he did it. We still can’t connect all the pieces.  

I go in cycles of wondering what more I could have done for him. I still carry around pain and deep sorrow for him because I know now how much pain he was in.  And of course, these last two years I’ve had to come to grips with my life without him at the helm of our family. 

I was able to push through the pain and grief because I am very clear that there are no accidents in life. I’ve always been passionate about knowing one’s purpose.

We all cope with death differently. We all cope with suicide differently. I gained this unexplainable strength from God to keep my kids and I together and make the life changes necessary for us to work again.  For better or worse, I coped with my husband’s suicide by throwing myself into my work. 

I’ve been a leader for 25 years. I started my profession in the networking marketing industry. I believe that everything I’ve been groomed for is to not just cope with my husband’s suicide but to help others understand the importance of a strong vision. 

I have come to know, even more than I did, that all of my life experiences had prepared me for what is to come. I have known for a very long time that my passion in helping other people connect with their vision is what I am meant to do. 

Since my husband’s death, I now see it as my life’s mission. 

I’ve seen firsthand what happens when someone loses their purpose. I am someone who believes so strongly in having a scared vision and the importance of having a strong mission in life. I’ve been personally impacted by the lack of vision.

Depression is such an epidemic in our world right now in people of all ages. I will continue to grow my community, Infinite Nation, to come up alongside people to get connected to their vision by doing speaking, events, workshops, and eventually bigger media. 

In the last two years, I have been forced to step into roles both personally and professionally a whole lot faster than I had planned. 

My kids and I have learned a lot through this process and have come to understand that not everyone can understand the choices we have made to get through this and rebuild. It has been sad to know that some people out of their own discomfort simply don’t know what to say so they just don’t.

My mission has gotten bigger but my circle of friends has gotten smaller. And I am totally okay with being alone.

Never in a million years did I envision being a widow from a tragedy like this. My overall life vision, my purpose and what kind of mom and person I wanted to be has not changed. It actually has become magnified. 

I believe each of us has a unique gift or talent we were born with. We were created to put our gifts into action while here on Earth. As children we knew who we were authentically and as we grew up we were conditioned. I think people lose their authentic self. When we get really quiet and directed back to creating a vision of a life we really want, our lives become easier to live out. 

Vision is everything and mine is so crystal clear. 

{About This Kick Ass Story}

Carey Conley is a Speaker and Entrepreneurial Coach specializing in creating a clear, concise vision for her client’s businesses and lives. She is driven to help entrepreneurs succeed. Carey helps clients monetize their business through specific tools and training. Carey is also a weekly contributor to the nationally syndicated morning magazine show, Daybreak USA, and The Experience Pros Radio Show.

Carey is a mother of two grown children and resides in Scottsdale, AZ.

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